I hate anxiety with a burning high

I hate looking back at who I was before I developed anxiety. It makes me want to cry. I was outgoing, happier, and more confident—I didn't care about much. Now, I feel like a mere shadow of that person. I can’t even go out anywhere new without having a panic attack about what might happen. I isolate myself in my room because it is really the only place I feel safe. On cherry on top, I feel like I need anxiety to keep me grounded. I often worry that I’m being annoying and that I need to be humbled.