Ok I think I'm there

Hello Autism Parenting community.

I've put off posting on here for a long time. I didn't think I needed it. As of now I've been humbled. I need help. We all feel how hard autism is. Those of us that post on here seem to be the ones that have found a breaking point. Today I'm feeling that. No amount of meditation, journaling, working out, eating different, sleep, therapy, yoga, or anything else I've tried is resetting me anymore. I wake up with a short fuse and go to bed with a shorter one. My kid doesn't deserve a dad that's always irritated with him. I don't deserve to not have support that doesnt internalize or judge my struggles. My therapist says that I need a 911 person. Turns out, at least in my eyes, I absolutely do not have one of those. Can someone here please help me? Is someone here also desperate for a safe person to have contact with that will let you yell, cry, brood, or whatever it is that you need in that moment to purge the pressure so that you can get through the rest of the day?