So… what do we do now?

My son has been having digestion issues, so bad that I was absolutely sure he had a blockage or something that was causing encopresis. He never has formed poops, it’s and it smells like death. We have tried potty training many times and stopped because he wouldn’t stop melting down. He pees just fine, but will not poop. And I thought he was in pain or something. However, he went to the GI doctor and no blockage… nothing odd with the bloodwork. So that means it’s behavioral and diet right? I have been worried about his diet for a while, as he seems to have no energy at all and gets sick often. His mother is the custodial parent, and he has full range to eat what he wants, when he wants. The problem is he is 8 and will snack all day long on cookies, Froot Loops, chips. We have some things like that at our house, but trying to move to the more healthy alternatives and he has to ask permission, and we have a snack schedule so that he will still eat meals. He will not eat vegetables or fruit period, I sometimes have been successful by hiding it in his food, but even then most of the time he will deny it if it’s homemade. I don’t know why but he gets so upset by food made in the oven or stove, but our house doesn’t have a microwave. I just don’t know what to do from here. I want to work on potty training more because he’s so big and I really don’t want to wipe his butt forever 😭 please no judgement, I just feel like something is wrong and he can’t tell me what it is.