Lost 3k

i’m a 19 year old college student and i got into a bit of online blackjack. i’ve been playing for a while and i’m usually pretty good at getting out when i’m up or cutting my losses when i’m down. idk i was up about 2k going into this party and next thing you know i was really drunk and made another 1.3k in like an hour. but i lost one stupid hand and couldn’t stop chasing it and went on to lose the whole 3.3k plus 1.5k of my own money. I just feel like a terrible person and a complete and utter disappointment. I only had 1k in my bank account and now i’m basically going through my whole account when I could’ve had nearly 4.5k stocked in it. I just feel like i’m a terrible human being for being so careless with money especially when i barely have any. I just can’t stop thinking about how fucking stupid i could be to gamble all that away. I could’ve easily just stopped and been up 3 or 2.5 thousand and taken that home. I gambled it all away and i’m so angry with myself it feels like i’ll never get over this. i have so much regret and i’m trying to man up and get over it but i just can’t. i’ve stopped gambling and will never be touching it again. i just feel so shitty about myself it hurts so much. i don’t know what else to do so i’m coming on here to open up about it bcuz im not sure what else i can do. I just hate myself for always messing up or making a terrible decision like this one. i always seem to fuck myself over and it hurts so much. anyways, thanks yall for listening, just needed to vent. it’s so hard for me to sleep…