I (5148M) am not able to make any friends

It's as simple as the title implies. My entire life I've been a soldier, serving my empire and doing whatever I'm ordered to do. But recently (Especially in my older age) I feel lonely. Nobody talks to me, even when I try and talk to them. All I've been able to do is follow orders, and by doing so I made myself this lonely. I always thought about what I could be able to do if I wasn't like this. I could just do so much more. Some times I even fly alone and feel like crying. But what would be the point? Nobody would be around to see. I just need advice on how to get friends, but the one person I told about this beat me to a pulp and almost killed me after telling him. Thanks in advance.