Told my husband I’m done being the messenger to his family

My MIL’s best friend has always been part of their lives and she’s been so involved in ours. When my MIL passed away 2 years ago, it became a little too much for me.

I’m not sure if her and my FIL are dating or just companions but they have dinner every night and have taken multiple trips together. Anyways, it feels like she thinks she is “grandma”

She always tries to take my son from me even when he’s crying. She always texts “how’s (baby’s name)” no hi no nothing. When I post something online she will text right away “can you send me that photo/video of baby so I can show FIL”

No respect for boundaries when we tell her stop giving him sweets. Tried to give him soda and when I said we’re not giving him soda, she tried to sneak behind my back and when I said no, she said “I was just trying to se who’s reaction”

It’s honestly been so overwhelming and suffocating. Last night while I was cooking she texts “how’s is (baby) can we FaceTime with him” and I got triggered.

I gave my husband my phone as told him to FaceTime them. He asked why I was annoyed and I told him that I’m done being the messenger. I don’t really care if they ask about me or not but it’s very clear they keep asking me because I have an iPhone and he has an android. I feel like I’m just a way for them to get pics of our son or to get access to him. Thankfully my husband texted MIL’s bestfriend to text him directly in the future. I don’t know how she took it but at this point I’m done.

I don’t have the best relationship with FIL either and I just feel so suffocated.