Hidden Agenda (PS4) my review (hint: it sucks)

Hidden Agenda is a PS4 game by some devs who played Until Dawn and thought they could "improve on it in every way" (actual quote from an interview I watched), so they made Hidden Agenda.

First, I'll tell you what doesn't suck about this game. The graphics. The graphics are stunning. Everything is rendered in real time and looks stunning. I don't think that's hard to do in a game that is exclusively canned animations, but nonetheless, the graphics are great. The story is also quite good, and the characters are very believable, from the closeted lesbianism of the district attorney to the tenacity of the main police detective you play.

Now, what does suck, which is pretty much everything else. I'll get the games biggest and most crippling fault out of the way- it's less than an hour long. Yes, that's right. It came out in 2017 and it's less than an hour long. I was on chapter 3, expecting there to be at least 10 chapters, and the credits started rolling, and I exclaimed (censored) out loud. This game should cost $4, not $25. It is meant to be played "co-op" with a bunch of people on the couch on your smartphones. Yes, smartphones. This game does not use the controller, it uses smartphones. Why? I don't know. There's literally nothing about it that lends itself any better to smartphones than controllers, in fact the parts that involve aiming suffer significantly from being on a laggy touch device that interfaces with your wifi rather than the PS4 directly, but it is what it is. I played alone, and based on what I've learned, I assume playing in a group must be exceedingly frustrating, as parts that involve shooting somebody or quick time events require EVERYONE to successfully do the thing in question or the event fails.

I'm going to play it again, partially out of massochism as well as because there were a lot of story points that I feel weren't fully explored based on the decisions I made. I'm pretty sure the D.A. is crooked and I'm also pretty sure I can unlock a fun lesbian scene with her and the lead detective if I play my cards right, so that's what I'm aiming for in my next 100+ hour (jks) play through.

It's very funny to hear the devs say that they thought they could improve on Until Dawn, because this farce of a game, the length of which wouldn't even have been impressive in 1987, falls short of Until Dawn in every way. Production values are lower, the story is much worse, the length is pathetic (Until dawn isn't very long either, mind you).

Honestly I can't understand why a garbage game like this would even get released, especially on PS4 with sony being so much more careful about what sees the light of day on their baby vs Microsoft.... but it is what it is. Do I recommend that you buy it? No. You can buy a fair bit of beer for $25 and I think getting drunk and playing a game you already own would be a lot more fun. Do I recommend that you play it at a friend's house, who has already paid for it, and no doubt regrets his/her decision? Sure. But Don't expect much.

On a scale of 1-10 with 1 being Superman on N64 and 10 being Zelda Breath of the Wild/Horizon Zero Dawn territory, I give this game a 1.5.

Booooooo-urns.