guilt
After the war, many young Alter Egos lost their parents or guardians. With several orphanages targeted by the AAEF, those children were forced to fend for themselves. Some decided to stay in their parents' home after their disappearance, turning it into their refuge when the AAEF found no one else there and left.
It should have been the same for Wigalley. She could easily return to her old house. After all, maybe only the door was badly damaged and most of the furniture was stolen. Nothing more. She could modify it as she pleased.
...but, for some reason, she couldn't. From that night on, she couldn't even go within fifty meters of her old house. She had always refused to return to that place. She wouldn't be able to bear it.
And so, she was left completely homeless, spending the night only at her friends' or her girlfriend's houses.
One night, though, Wigalley plucked up the courage and decided to go home. Come on. It's been about eleven or twelve years since that night. It's just a house, and she should have gotten over it by now.
Right?
As usual, she tensed up as she stepped into the neighborhood where her home was located, and a chill ran down her spine as she saw that particular building in the distance. It was closer than she thought. Her body almost refused to move. To get even an inch closer. But Wigalley managed to push her way through.
As expected, the entrance was destroyed, the door knocked to the ground. The Alter Ego remembered hearing the sound of an explosion nearby that night, possibly coming from her mother's bazooka when... no. Just, go on.
She was sweating and shaking terribly as she approached the entrance of her old house, her heart nearly bursting out of her chest. It hadn't even been 10 minutes. Although to her, that felt like hours. She took a deep breath... And set foot inside the cold building. There was almost nothing there. The Alter Ego criminals had probably stolen many things during the year, given the house was abandoned. Surprisingly, only a few things remained: the ominous darkness of the interior, adorned by the multiple shards of glass, pieces of broken wood, and debris all over the floor.
Wigalley struggled to keep her mind from wandering. She felt sick. Dizzy. And when she thought she was finally making progress after about five steps, she made the terrible decision of looking around and saw it. That huge, familiar stain of dried blood on the wall, with the almost nonexistent moonlight reflecting directly off it. As if it were mocking her, reminding her of what happened... of what she had done.
"Oh my fucking god."
She looked away immediately, but it was too late. The combination of several dried blood stains on the worn wall, the result of the violent attack on her parents, was more than enough. They were back, as strong as ever.
Why?
Why?
Why?
Those were the same words that had repeated themselves in her mind for the past years, like a tormenting mantra.
Since that night. The night that condemned her to that overwhelming but familiar feeling of guilt.
Why couldn't she have been...? She didn't even know anymore.
...a better daughter? Why did she have to be so neglectful? So... naive?
Wigalley didn't even care that she was only seven years old at the time. She disobeyed her parents, destroyed all the progress they'd been making to hide from the AAEF, to protect themselves, and to protect her...
And all because she wanted to play outside. A simple, childish wish, nothing more, but one that was almost forbidden in times of war, for everyone's safety. For her safety. And she didn't listen.
Why?
The more those words and phrases repeated themselves in her mind, the sicker she felt. Guilt was doing its job as always, now taking advantage of the fact that the Alter Ego couldn't suppress it with her usual personality. She was in its territory, wanting so badly to escape, but at the same time, unable to move, as she found herself on her knees.
They're probably already dead. And it's all her fault.
And if they weren't... What would they think of her? How would they react to seeing her, their naive daughter, who had so carelessly revealed their location to the AAEF, even though they had warned her many times to stay with them, inside?
Who had caused their kidnapping and possibly made them suffer such a terrible fate?
Why?
After the war, many young Alter Egos lost their parents or guardians. With several orphanages targeted by the AAEF, those children were forced to fend for themselves. Some decided to stay in their parents' home after their disappearance, turning it into their refuge when the AAEF found no one else there and left.
It should have been the same for Wigalley. She could easily return to her old house. After all, maybe only the door was badly damaged and most of the furniture was stolen. Nothing more. She could modify it as she pleased.
...but, for some reason, she couldn't. From that night on, she couldn't even go within fifty meters of her old house. She had always refused to return to that place. She wouldn't be able to bear it.
And so, she was left completely homeless, spending the night only at her friends' or her girlfriend's houses.
One night, though, Wigalley plucked up the courage and decided to go home. Come on. It's been about eleven or twelve years since that night. It's just a house, and she should have gotten over it by now.
Right?
As usual, she tensed up as she stepped into the neighborhood where her home was located, and a chill ran down her spine as she saw that particular building in the distance. It was closer than she thought. Her body almost refused to move. To get even an inch closer. But Wigalley managed to push her way through.
As expected, the entrance was destroyed, the door knocked to the ground. The Alter Ego remembered hearing the sound of an explosion nearby that night, possibly coming from her mother's bazooka when... no. Just, go on.
She was sweating and shaking terribly as she approached the entrance of her old house, her heart nearly bursting out of her chest. It hadn't even been 10 minutes. Although to her, that felt like hours. She took a deep breath... And set foot inside the cold building. There was almost nothing there. The Alter Ego criminals had probably stolen many things during the year, given the house was abandoned. Surprisingly, only a few things remained: the ominous darkness of the interior, adorned by the multiple shards of glass, pieces of broken wood, and debris all over the floor.
Wigalley struggled to keep her mind from wandering. She felt sick. Dizzy. And when she thought she was finally making progress after about five steps, she made the terrible decision of looking around and saw it. That huge, familiar stain of dried blood on the wall, with the almost nonexistent moonlight reflecting directly off it. As if it were mocking her, reminding her of what happened... of what she had done.
"Oh my fucking god."
She looked away immediately, but it was too late. The combination of several dried blood stains on the worn wall, the result of the violent attack on her parents, was more than enough. They were back, as strong as ever.
Why?
Why?
Why?
Those were the same words that had repeated themselves in her mind for the past years, like a tormenting mantra.
Since that night. The night that condemned her to that overwhelming but familiar feeling of guilt.
Why couldn't she have been...? She didn't even know anymore.
...a better daughter? Why did she have to be so neglectful? So... naive?
Wigalley didn't even care that she was only seven years old at the time. She disobeyed her parents, destroyed all the progress they'd been making to hide from the AAEF, to protect themselves, and to protect her...
And all because she wanted to play outside. A simple, childish wish, nothing more, but one that was almost forbidden in times of war, for everyone's safety. For her safety. And she didn't listen.
Why?
The more those words and phrases repeated themselves in her mind, the sicker she felt. Guilt was doing its job as always, now taking advantage of the fact that the Alter Ego couldn't suppress it with her usual personality. She was in its territory, wanting so badly to escape, but at the same time, unable to move, as she found herself on her knees.
They're probably already dead. And it's all her fault.
And if they weren't... What would they think of her? How would they react to seeing her, their naive daughter, who had so carelessly revealed their location to the AAEF, even though they had warned her many times to stay with them, inside?
Who had caused their kidnapping and possibly made them suffer such a terrible fate?
Why?