Minor drama in r/amioverreacting after OP bans his son from having a religious meal at religious friend's house.

edit: after not getting the responses he wanted, OP makes a post on r/atheist where he admits that he has double standards regarding Islam and Christianity

~

OP makes a post on r/amioverreacting titled 'AIO? My son wants to attend a religious meal/ceremony at his friends house and I said no'

Here is the contents of the post:

My wife and I have three kids. We have chosen to raise them without any religious beliefs. My son is in middle school and it’s a large diverse school, quite different than his grade school.

My son has a friend who first called himself “Dave” (a generic American name) and Dave’s family is very religious. My son recently told me that his friend has started using his birth name, which is religious. And he has been wearing a robe to school. Both of which indicate to me that this friend is way more religious than I thought.

My son was invited to a dinner/ceremony at this kids house. Okay. But yesterday Dave said my son needs to not eat all day. And based on that, my answer is no. He’s not allowed to participate in this religion or its rituals.

My wife says I’m being a jerk and overreacting. I don’t think I am, I don’t want him around this. If he wants to as an adult, fine, but he can’t make this decision at his age. Being friends is one thing, participating in a religion is over the line.

Edit: Wow you all are triggered. I'm blocking anyone who does not comment in good faith.

Link to the post

OP responding to someone saying yes, he is over-reacting

It's not that I don't want him to participate in any religion. I don't want him to participate in this, at his age. I also expect someday he'll drink ten beers and have a hangover the next, but that day should be when he's in college, not 7th grade. Same thing.

You’re equating sharing a meal of significance to binge drinking as a child? Yeah, you’re not operating on fact based logic but your own personal bigotry.

•

Ah yes the Denverite couching their bigotry in progressive language.

OP's reply

Would you let your child attend a Scientologist ceremony?

•

Op responds to someone who brings up Christmas and Easter meals

if you have Christmas or Easter dinners, even as non-believers, you are participating in religious expression. We celebrate those things in a secular way.
Examine why this one is triggering you. I am not "triggered". That implies an overly emotional reaction. I understand what this is, and I logically do not want him to participate.

•

Definitely overreacting. If I look hard enough I feel like I can see the neckbeard from here. Imagine not wanting your child to experience the world outside of your beliefs.

OP's reply

I don’t want him to start vaping or join amway either. Look at my neckbeard.

•

OP responds to one of the few people agreeing with him

Thanks for at least one sane comment. These people are so far up their ass they cannot see straight. I guarantee if I posted this asking if my son could go to a Scientologist event, the results would be 180 degrees opposite.

•

How old is he? I don't really see why him not eating for a day or the friend wearing a rope is a reason to deny him? He's opening his horizon's to other experiences and ways of leading life. That's very good for his personal development. YOR.

OP's reply

Some experiences are good and some are bad. This is a negative experience and it’s my job to understand what’s harmful and keep him away from it.

When I was 17 I thought it was good to smoke cigarettes and my parents didn’t. I know better now.

•

I say let him go and just be part of it, attending Ramadan doesn’t make you a Muslim. A one time meeting won’t turn your son into a Muslim, Christian or Jew. When you raise a kid without any religions belief is also important for him to acknowledge the existence of those ceremonies and traditions.

OP's response

When you raise a kid without any religions belief is also important for him to acknowledge the existence This is not acknowledging the existence of something. This is participation. We all acknowledge it exists.

•

op getting deffensive

The level of worry you have points to you not raising a son child who can think for themselves

You don't know what you're talking about. My son is free to do nearly anything he wants. This is the first thing I have ever told him he cannot do, except obvious things like eat ten pounds of Halloween candy.

So you let him participate in Halloween despite its religious origins?

•

Op's comment

I'm not actively anti-religion. I simply think he should not be exposed to this, at his age, in this way.

Or, you could call the other boy’s parents I have no contact info. I have seen the mother, she would not talk to me.

Hmmm, I wonder why…

OP's response back

Because she isn't allowed to speak to men. I don't agree with this, at all.

•

Your son is not your property. You don't get to freely dictate his choices. 

OP's response

No, but as a parent I have a responsibility to keep him away from harmful or counterproductive things. When he was five he wanted to watch a slasher movie, and I didn't let him.

Other comments I found

Don’t throw your son to the wolves. Have you seen how insane they’ve become?

Im with you, no religious freedom for my minor children.