Where did I go wrong

I'll keep this brief. I've gotten into a fight with my wife. She says she doesn't feel loved and I yell at the kids to much. I do yell. For instance, I put markets up because I didn't want my oldest to draw all over everything. Then she got them back out and I lost my shit and yelled. I should have just got her a coloring book.

I felt like I was to exhausted to do coloring. It's hard to have the energy.

Does anyone else have this problem? How do you keep calm? How do you get up the energy even when you don't want to?

I'd love to discuss what I can do for my wife but that's a much longer thing. I feel like all my energy is spent on the family but it's still not enough.