I’m really struggling with loneliness
My parents don’t speak to me. My siblings and family have forgotten that I exist for the past 5 years now and me and my ex are about to get divorced.
The relationship with my ex and I was so mentally exhausting, and I don’t think I can cope anymore.
I have a child who’s three years old and I don’t know how much more I can cope. Im trying my best to pray, and have faith in Allah, but it’s so hard. I can’t help but to feel so so alone. I feel like no one loves me or cares for me. It’s so hard to accept because everyone has family and seems like they have such a happy life. But here I am. Struggling emotionally. It’s so hard. My mother in law is threatening me, and I feel so vulnerable. I feel so embarrassed that I’ve come here, but I genuinely feel so alone and weak. I wish my parents didn’t abuse me for years, and that I didn’t go into care at 17.
I wish that I had a family who loved me. I genuinely try my best to be kind, to still be loving, and to make everyone around me smile. But I just don’t think I can cope anymore . I really can’t. And I’ve had enough of this facade. Exam season is coming up, and I’m already feeling so WEAK.
Yet I get up everyday, feed my daughter,go to work, go to university etc- and pretend that everything is okay. If u we’re to see me in person you’d think damn, she has her whole life put together, she dresses well, she speaks well, she’s a good mum- but deep down I just don’t know HOW much more I can handle.
In my religion, they say have Sabr (patience)- and that Allah will help me. But I really just can’t see anything right now. I keep hoping and praying, and having faith but I’m really starting to question my strength. For the past week I’ve been crying non stop. And it’s meant to be the holy month of Ramadan. I can’t believe that I’m saying this, but I wish WISH there was a way out of this.
I just can’t stop crying and I WISH this feeling could just stop. Please please pray for me.