Jesus wants me to teach suuuuunBEAMS

PIMO here… After I had a baby, I disappeared from church for a couple months [I won’t go on about how Mormons won’t just fucking stay home if they’re sick…] Come back for the first time and I’m immediately called to be a sunbeams teacher. How convenient is it though that my other child is in sunbeams this year????? It’s like they can smell my distaste for the church, so they’re locking me in with the only calling I’ll accept. Bitches, man…