Should I(31f) let my 30 year friendship with my best friend (30f) go? She almost ruined my wedding and might be falsely accusing another friend of assault.

My best friend and I have been friends since we were babies. Our fathers were friends and that's how we grew up together. I have always helped her the best I could; for example, I would clean her room for her as children, even as adults i would go over to her home and clean her house for her, i would give her money whenever she needed it (including my husband) and she would never pay any of it back, and whenever she called me to help or participate in whatever she had going on i was there. Ive never asked her for money or anything else because she was always going through something. When i would invite her to my events, most of the time she wouldn't show up and when she did she kinda made it about her. I got married in 20221 She was one of my maids of honor. My wedding was a mess but she defiantly made it worse.

During the planning of the wedding, she made things very difficult, when my brides' maids would plan surprises like a bachelorette party, bridal brunch and other things, they would tell he not to tell me but she would tell me anyway! ruining the surprises. That caused a problem between the brides' maids and she was also trying to un everything which made people want to drop out!She lied and told people that i broke her arm before and ive never broken anyone's anything!!!..!!.!!! She also has a problem with my other best friend(35f) that i met in 2018. She claims she doesnt like her but couldnt give an explanation why.

A week or two before the wedding she told me that one of my husband's best men sexually assaulted her when we were younger (we all were apart of the same friend group) and she said she just never told anyone other than her mom. She also told me that she stopped hanging around him a long time ago because of it. Now, me hearing this for the first time im trying to think of ways to fix my wedding so that it is a safe space, and she is comfortable. In order to do that i had to tell my husband to get him to remove him from the wedding and i let her know that. At first she was saying it would be awkward and that she would be uncomfortable around him since she hasnt been around him in a long time, but she retracked that statement after i told he i would have to let me husband know so he can uninvite him.

I know i was wrong for still telling my husband but i couldnt keep him in my wedding after hearing something like that. I mad at him now fo hurting my best friend in the worst way! Ive been through similar situations and its alot to deal with so i thought i was doing the right thing. At the reception after dancing and having a good time me and my bridal party stepped outside for air and to converse and drink. My best friend comes out fussing asking why we left her husband in the reception build because he almost got into a fight with someone. Im think why is anyone fighting right now we are having a good time, but we finally got him outside with us.

A small tense conversation starts to happen between her and the bridal party because she was making the conversation about her and her husbands problems even bringing up older problem with her and i (example: i would invite her to hang out with me and she would ALWAYS bring her husband! Then she wouldnt stay long and leave her husband with me. I asked her to stop doing that, so she just stopped coming over all together) After the reception my husband was starting to get mad at her because everyone in the bridal shower was helping us with clean up at the venue but her! She was also complaining the whole time and rushing her husband (which is my husband's brother) to leave even though he wanted to stay and help and hang with us.

Fast forward last week the best man calls both her and i, I missed the call from him, but she called me a short time after and let me know she spoke with him. Im not sure what they talked about, but she said they had a good conversation and that he wants to reconnect with everyone cause he misses us. So i call him back because im thinking everything is fine between even one or they settled their situation. He tells me the same thing he told her and wants me to pass his number to my husband so they can talk. My husband doesnt want to because he doesnt know what happened between her and him or is someone is lying and he doesnt want me to talk to him anymore which i agree.

I call my best friend back to let her know what happened and what my husband said and she is saying things like "Dont talk to him about that because ive let that trauma in my life go. I dont need him coming back to me bringing stuff that ive gotten over up again. He apologized to me years ago and i forgave him so its no need to bring it back up. A victim doesnt want ot keep reliving a situation ove and over again." So im thinking i can ask her anything since we have been friends for forever and she knows me. I ask her " Did it happen and are you sure you are over it" she says yes. I know now that i should have asked that in a better way and i take full responsibility for my mistake but she sent me a text after saying i hurt her by questioning her and that she doesnt want to be friends more nd that she forgave him but she doesnt know if she can forgive me and to stay away from her.

After that conversation i was getting advice from my mother in law about it and she revealed to me that my best friend told my wedding planner (which is my husbands cousin) that my other best friend and few other people and i have sex and whenever my husband leaves for work or military that i cheat on him with them. The wedding planner did dop out of doing my wedding a week before and im not sure if thats the reason why or not but all of that stressed me out and is still stressing me out to this day, i dont know if i should get answers, fight for the friendship, or move on. Im really hurt behind it because i do still love her but i also have to do whats best for me. please help