Using a narcissist’s own words to disarm them

I made a post earlier about my success with this method, so I thought I would write a list of phrases you can use in this way. This is not advocating for being mean or rude, it’s simply speaking their language in a way that makes sense to them. Nparents don’t understand respectful conversations based on logic, so you have to explain it in their terms.

To use when they throw a fit over something minor:

🌸”Your generation gets offended so easily, you’re all a bunch of snowflakes.”

🌸 You’re mad when I do that? Well, I get mad when you (insert something they do that gets on your nerves).”

🌸”Oh, you feel upset? That was nothing compared to the time….(insert story to one-up their experience)”.

🌸”So I can do a hundred things right but the one time I make a mistake it’s the end of the world?”

🌸”Geez, you’re so sensitive! Grow up already!”

🌸”Well, God forgives me.”

🌸”I guess I’m just the worst kid ever. I can’t do anything right, can I?”

To use when they’re critical or rude:

🌸”You just like to argue, don’t you?”

🌸”That’s not how you treat family!”

🌸”You’re so ungrateful! Some people would be happy to have a kid who (insert a good quality/thing)”

🌸”I can see your parents didn’t teach you any respect. They should have given you a good spanking- that would have taken care of your attitude!”

🌸”You’re going to talk to me like that after all I’ve done for you?”

🌸”If you don’t cut that out you’re not getting (insert planned outing, gift, etc)”

To use when they directly lie:

🌸”I’m sorry you think I said that, but I didn’t.”

🌸”So what, are you saying I’m a bad person now?”

🌸”It’s sad that you think I would say/do something so mean.”