Anyone else’s parents have a “kind” demeanor?

It’s the little things with my mom. The way she makes everything about her, even when she’s pretending to listen to my problems. She’ll listen, but somehow the conversation always turns back to her, her experiences, her feelings, and how much she’s suffered. Her suffering always seems to be at the center of it all. But it’s super subtle.

But the part that really shook me recently-is how she can say the most cutting, hurtful things in the sweetest tone. It’s like she’s smiling at me, but I’m bleeding inside. It’s the backhanded compliments, the little jabs disguised as advice, the way she’ll make me feel so small with just a few words, but it’s always coated in sweetness.

The things this woman has said to me, even when she’s trying to “help”, have cut deeper than I can put into words. It’s like she memorizes sensitive information about me just to stab me with it later on. She does it without raising her voice or raising any alarm. It’s just her.

Anyone else?