Did you grow up thinking you were the problem?

I had a sudden realization that the reason I’ve grown to hate myself wasn’t just because of the critical voice that my parents put in my head.

It was also because I was alone and whatever they decided was the problem was the final rule. And 100% of the time I was the problem. Many people realize at some point that they are not treated well by their parents, but what happens when you never even dare to think they are wrong?

I grew up thinking I was a monster because I thought I was the one hurting my parents when I was trying to express my pain or defend myself.

Even now, when I now this, I catch myself thinking I am a monster who doesn’t deserve love just because I ask for what I need or feel happy for a second.

I’m just curious, did anyone else grow up like this? If so, how did you manage to overcome this?

Edit for grammar checks