will I lose people if I’m not kind?

Recently, I came to a realisation that I happen to carry most conversations by asking a lot of questions and actively listening. So I decided to stop doing that. I saw people who I talk to awkwardly stare at me, without saying anything as I didn't carry the conversation after initial greeting or respond when they started their one sided speech.

Normally I'd feel guilty for not being nice, but today I felt nothing. It felt good actually.

So all this time I was a doormat.

It feels very unnatural when I get asked personal questions. But it happens so rarely I'm unsure if I don't actively talk to people I'll end up with nothing.

I feel like there's a balance, because sometimes (mainly at work) I need to keep some people in my life because of the perks they bring. Is it wrong to be like this?